A Godly focus on marriage

Jamie and I believe that God has given us a specific message to deliver to the body of Christ as well as the anointing to have our message received by the Church. Both of us have come out of stable households where our parents have been in long term marriages. 

Jamie’s mother passed away a number of years ago having been diagnosed with MS in her early thirties. We witnessed her Dad’s loving care for her during her slow decline in health until her eventual death. His love for her was and will always be a picture of God’s love for us demonstrated through the life of one of his faithful followers. 

I think that is part of the reason God has chosen us to speak His word concerning marriage. You need to understand that most spouses of MS patients leave their mates. In view of that statistic, it is particularly significant that Jamie’s Dad didn’t leave but provided the majority of her Mom’s care for over 20 years. It has been a powerful picture of their love for each other and God’s plan for how we are to live together as husbands and wives. 

Today the divorce rate in the U.S. stands at 50% for first marriages and 65% for second marriages. Even higher for a third or fourth marriage. The biggest reason for divorce? There are many but all tied to one general theme; “We just couldn’t get along.” And our children have born the brunt of our unfaithfulness to our mates. Today, 85% of kids with behavioral problems and 71% of high school dropouts come from fatherless homes. Children from single parent homes are more likely to have teenaged pregnancies and suffer a host of emotional and behavioral problems.

If this were not bad enough and it certainly is bad, the divorce rate in the church is the same if not worse than in the general population. We make all the same excuses for why we can’t get along and then have the audacity to bring God into the mix and say “God doesn’t want me to be unhappy.” I can hear the voice of Jesus saying “you are badly mistaken, have you not read in my word that I hate divorce?”

Please hear me in what I am saying and what I am not saying. I am saying that divorce is much to prevalent in our society. We are casual in our commitment to each other when we should be married for life. I have even witnessed pastors in their zeal to focus on evangelism say that marriage is unimportant in relation to bringing people into the Kingdom. What heresy! How many people have been turned off permanently by the ungodly ways in which we have treated out marriage mates?

What I am not saying is that there is never a legitimate reason for divorce. There certainly are and we must never encourage someone to remain in a dangerous or unhealthy relationship where their own safety or health is put at risk by the sinful behavior of a spouse. 

What we need is a godly focus on what God considers important. We need to put our own selfish desires away and ask for forgiveness. Jesus responded when asked by the Pharisees regarding divorce. “Because of your hardness of heart Moses permitted you to divorce your wives; but from the beginning it has not been this way.” 

Power Potential

This week at church we had guest speaker, Robby Dawkins (The Finger of God, Furious Love), come and speak. It was one of those times when we’re called to a place outside of our comfort zone. He reminded us that Jesus, more often than not, ministered to the UN-Churched, whereas most of us in church, minister in the most obvious place, Church. The place where we won’t standout. Less awkward. Less conspicuous.

However, Robby stretches us to look for those around us when in public places, especially in dark places when there is a need. Why? Because the enemy already thinks he has won those lost types into his kingdom, and there is less resistance. Less warfare. Robby reminds us that God really loves those less lovely types. We encounter less warfare with these types than when ministering to a Christian. There is more resistance with Christians because of his fear of the power potential. 

These lost, dark types need reaching as well. That is what Jesus modeled. He ministered to the sick (physically and mentally), maimed (crippled, blind, etc), prostitutes, tax collectors (dishonest business men), adulterers, etc. The next day, I was in Target and the little, old lady in line in front of me was saying how badly her toothache was. I knew what God was up to. The question is, was I up for the challenge? 

I was reminded of Robby’s comment to obSERVE where there is need around you. She definitely had need. So after my purchase I caught up with her and asked about her tooth. Then I asked to pray for her to be healed. She thanked me afterward telling me the pain was gone. It was a moment that ministered to me more than to her because I was obedient.  It was a win-win power moment 1) for me, but more importantly, 2) for her as she was reaching her “power potential” by recognizing The Healer of her body and her life and 3) for growing the kingdom of God.  

What God Wants for Your Marriage

Today we spoke at our church on What God Wants for Your Marriage.  Since we want everyone to know that the Holy Spirit is the key to resolving our relational problems, that was the focus. One of the things that the Holy Spirit had dropped into our understanding this month was that it is kind of like when you are in a crowded, noisy environment, yet you are still able to hear your cell phone when it goes off. And other people look at you in amazement that you actually heard it, asking how in the world could you hear that?

Your ear has to become trained to hearing that sound. You can do that with the Holy Spirit. You can train yourself to be alert and attentive and to discern the voice of the Holy Spirit over distraction.

Distraction is just insignificant noise designed by the enemy to do just that... confuse, distract, and to keep you crazy-busy. Tune it out so that you can receive the significant. That being the guidance and counsel of the Holy Spirit. Proverbs says, "... a wise man hides himself from evil, while the foolish man blindly forges ahead." The Holy Spirit will lead, guide and protect you away from destruction if you ask Him.

A Time to Heal

 In Ecclesiastes, The Preacher writes: "To Everything there is a season, and a time for every matter and purpose under heaven." After the latest revelation of wrongdoing and cover up, this time at Penn State University, I'm left to wonder what season are we in?

Is this a time to speak or a time to keep silent? Apparently officials at PSU felt it appropriate to keep silent and not to speak. How many of us when confronted with evil will simply look away? I'm asking myself the same question. When we encounter wickedness how do we respond? Do we take a stand and say enough or do we shrug our shoulders and say something like "you know the culture we live in."

Perhaps this tragedy will result in people making a decision to get involved, to not turn and look the other way. If any good can come from this, perhaps it is that some other vulnerable children somewhere will not have to endure years of torment, guilt and shame because someone close to their situation decided that enough was enough.

As a people, we must come to grips with the garbage that we allow to pass for acceptable behavior. We've been far to tolerant of people's aberrant lifestyles that result in death and destruction for them and those close to them. When will we stop kidding ourselves and embrace the absurdity that a perverted sexual lifestyle is not only wrong, it violates God's laws and the just penalty for that wrong will be enforced.

I hope and pray that this will be a turning point for our country. That we will turn from our wicked ways and seek out the one true God and ask His forgiveness.